So I have this slighted way where I disconnect from people completly. I fall so fast into an abyss of cute memory. When things head south I discredit everything. I burn evidence I ditch memory most bad but even the good ones I laugh off as a fake fuck while sipping kerosene. I’ve started questioning everything. Did I care I mean I have evidence that I did even if it’s just a cashed in plane ticket a fractured picture of jilted smiles. Maybe I’ve loved more than I give credit for but maybe I’ve never loved at all. Maybe it’s not that simple a kid chemist mixing things cooking up defeat.